ARE YOU READY TO UNDERTAKE A TRANSFORMATION?
When transformation comes knocking on your door, it unapologetically asks you to let go of parts of yourself and your life that are no longer of service in order move toward that which is. Sometimes, the welcoming of the new is right there to greet you. The key is to have the awareness to recognize it and the courage to take the actions for positive change.
Monumental life transformations don’t happen all that often, but they are the primary shapers of our lives. After reflecting upon my own experiences and those of my clients, I’ve been able to parse many of the signs indicating when we are in the space to commit to a positive transformation. Awareness is like a road map of understanding that can help you feel more positive while facing transition. May this road map serve as a support net for you, when you are ready to step over to the other side.
1. Something feels "stuck."
Feelings of "stuckness" are something everyone can relate to. Your job isn't fulfilling, but you don't know what else you would do. Your relationship isn't satisfying, but you are afraid to leave the security of what has been developed. You feel bored or unenthusiastic, but you can't figure out how to get out of the rut.
These are the moments when we often start to blame and judge others because we don't want to take responsibility for our own fear and discontent. These feelings tend to be physical and energetic versus analytic. But when you bring a true awareness and acceptance that you can control your mindset and your actions, you open up yourself for rubbing up against the uncomfortable and taking the actions for positive change. And once you engage in action, the fear and anxiety fall away. This is a perfect time for some serious “aloning.”
So, if you feel stuck, slow the heck down, and spend some time alone. Go on a solo hike or bike ride, shut down all forms of technology for the day (or longer), don’t make too many plans with friends or colleagues, and un-busy yourself. Get really honest with yourself of what role you play in these “stuck” feelings. What scenarios have you created that keep you from engaging in change.
2. Conflict arises in many areas of your life.
Transformation is defined as a thorough or dramatic change in form or appearance. When we are being asked to undergo a transformation, we must let go of that which is no longer serving us in order to call in that which does.
Are you saying things that are reactive instead of responding in a thoughtful, non-emotional manner? Are you fighting with your spouse, having a difficult time communicating with your children, or in constant disagreement with your co-workers?
Sure, these could simply be the regular ebbs and flows of life, but you can choose to observe them through a more expansive lens. If you are noticing an abnormal amount of conflict arise in different areas in your life, look deeper.
If you are open to make changes, where do you begin? Rather than worry about the difficulties that are arising, simply try to become the observer. Note what is happening, pay attention to how it makes you feel, and be open to exploring conflict in all relationships as a portal to your highest self.3. You feel disconnected from your body.
Do you feel lethargic and out of touch with your own body? Do you find yourself frequently saying the words, “I feel tired.”
Our bodies are equipped to handle a lot of movement. It is what they are designed to do. Culturally humans have gotten away from the regular movement that leads to positive thoughts, increased energy, happiness, stress release and more acute cognitive process.
When we are being called to undergo a transformation, much of our thought process is consumed by specific thoughts. These can be framed either in the positive or negative. “I want to feel stronger and more athletic.” “I am excited to get in the best shape of my life.” “I want to challenge myself to hike a 14’er."-or- “I’m so out of shape, I need to do something about this.” “I have gained so much weight, my clothes don’t fit right.” “I don’t have the energy to go do that hike with my kids.” If you find these types of thoughts are dominating your mindset then you are ready to undertake a physical transformation.
This is a key moment to seek out some coaching help. It’s the best investment you can make. A good coach will get you moving and bring structure to your life. Once you are moving you will notice the positive thoughts will be much more prevalent than negative thoughts. And we end up in the place of our most prevalent thoughts.
4. You’re barely sleeping, or want to sleep all the time.
If you are hearing the inner murmurs of beginning a transformation, you may experience a heightened and uncharacteristic amount of anxiety or depression. These feelings may impede your ability to have restful nights of sleep. It also may increase fatigue during the day where you just want to lay down.
The trick to getting through it is simply to listen and acknowledge it without judgement and know this is another indicator that you are ready for change. Regular, restful sleep is the primary regeneration mode for humans —physically, mentally and emotionally. Create and honor the discipline of a regular sleep schedule. If you can’t sleep, get up and read a book in soft light, write in a journal; you will soon feel sleepy. Avoid any screen time or technology. If you’re wiped out and need a nap, go ahead and honor it. Even 15-20 minutes can be rejuvenating and help you find the mindset for initiating your positive change.
Transformation isn't analytical. It's natural and intangible. It's slightly otherworldly. If you are feeling these big signs listen and pay attention. They may be telling you the answers or offering you the exact type of support that you need.
When you undertake the steps of engaging in a transformation the peaks can truly take your breath away. Everything insignificant seems to fall away. You are stripped back to your most basic self only tending to that which is of the utmost priority. You are honoring the courage and discipline to live the happy life you were designed to live.